Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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