idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Green mimosas i think yes
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
