Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
