Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
