i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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