this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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