The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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