She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
