We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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