Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
