If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
My cat gives me a boner
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I got inside last night via doggy door
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
