This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
