forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize