would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
mondays should just be called national damage control day
No more Irish car bombs ever.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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