Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
