all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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