I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Randomize
