nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
