dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
