My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
3 2 1 whiskey
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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