i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
