glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
