Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
