if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
