It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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