I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
