No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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