Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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