Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
