i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
