Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize