You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
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