I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
the liver wants what the liver wants
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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