I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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