Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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