he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
