sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize