They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
