no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
not ubering you a puppy
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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