If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
