Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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