is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
