Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
