Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Randomize
