It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
