Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
