i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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