So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
