I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
