If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize