Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Those nachos came to me in a dream
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
